A Million Little Pieces Of My Mind

Aging Gratefully

The Grumpy Barber Joke

By: Paul S Cilwa Posted: 2/10/2026 Page Views: 267
Hashtags: #Perspective #Attitude #FolkJoke #Humor #BarberJoke
One's attitude shapes one's perspective. You see what you're pre-disposed to see!
Estimated reading time: 2 minute(s) (429 words)

A man was getting a haircut prior to a trip to Rome. He mentioned the trip to the barber who responded, "Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty and full of Italians. You're crazy to go to Rome…So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking American Airlines," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"American?" exclaimed the barber. "That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late…So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at the downtown International Marriott."

"That dump! That's the worst hotel in the city. The rooms are small, the service is surly and they're overpriced…So, whatcha doing when you get there?"

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and we hope to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the barber. "You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the man again came in for his regular haircut. The barber asked him about his trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful!" enthused the man. "Not only were we on time in one of American's latest-generation Boeing 787-9s, but it was overbooked and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome, 28-year-old steward who waited on us hand and foot. And the hotel—it was great!

"They'd just finished a $25 million remodeling job and now it's the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us the presidential suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the barber, "I know you didn't get to see the pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, for as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder and explained that the pope likes to personally meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes later Pope Leo walked through the door!"

"Really?" asked the barber. "What'd he say?"

He said, "Bless you, my son! Where'd you get the shitty haircut?"